Friday, April 28, 2017

Its been awhile !

Its been a year since i have been active on here
 Well here is an Update ,
I work full time now as a caregiver. I am also a CNA!
Its coming up on Aria's 6th birthday ! I am planning to go out of  town that weekend
I have been having a hard time coping with things it seems these day. I cannot believe it has been six yearss where did the time go ?? any ways i am planning on writing more !!

Monday, August 15, 2016


Its been awhile since i last posted so here it goes. Im now 23 years old i have an amazing fiance. On December 15th, 2014 the unexpected happened. I went into labor a delivered a healthy baby girl, mind you i didnt know i was pregnant. I had started a job so i associated all the symptoms i had with that. We named her Clementine! She is the light of my world she has given me hope again. She is truly a gift from god. This year for Aria's fifth birthday we had a small party and did a balloon release and had a portriat made.

Monday, July 16, 2012

For My Daughter Aria Claire Elizabeth Lund

I heard that song and thought of you.
Life feels like a nightmare that just came true.
Sitting here looking at the sky,
Sitting here asking God why??
Sitting here holding back these tears.
Sitting here living a Mothers worst fear.
I may not have you here with me,
but forever and always my daughter you will be.
A part of my life I will never forget.
Letting you go sometimes I regret,
but God needed you back in Heaven.
You only spent 2 days here on earth in June,2011.
Its Now May,2012.
Life without you here on earth feels like I'm living in Hell.
Only a select few people understand.
The will the way and your very own special plan.
Your mission on earth was complete.
Now in Heaven you wait till me meet.
I know one day I will see you again.
God and only God knows when

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Poem 1

Yesterday was 7 months since you went away...
Life has changed so much for me.
I wonder if you were still here how life would be.
I miss you like crazy.
Somedays I wanna lay in bed and be lazy.
I stay up all night and sleep during the day.
I just wish you were here I wish there was someway.
I lost everything I lost you, I lost your dad..
I hate the way things are I just wanna scream because I am so mad.
How can people I trust take away the ones that I love the most.
They say the love i had for you guys I didn't have to boast.
You and him were my whole world.
We were so happy to have our little girl.
The first time we ever heard your heart
It was love from the start.
As we waiting the whole weekend.
We were guessing what you were
Alittle boy or a little girl.
We thought of names.
We picked Jude Steven Lund if you were a boy
We chose Aria Claire Elizabeth Lund who would have known that we chose the perfect name for a perfect angel.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

first letter to Aria after she passed away

my letter to aria

by Mickey Hershberger on Tuesday, June 28, 2011 at 1:14pm
Princess Aria Claire Elizabeth Lund,
I know your in a better place,
But Mommy and daddy miss you and want to see your face .
There is never a moment where you dont cross my mind.
I wish some how someway we could go back in time.
I just want to hold you and never let you go.
sometimes i wonder why god took took you ? that is something i want to know.
Sometimes i fell like it was my fault
and it hits my heart like a lightening bolt
But I know its not my fault Jesus took you home.
I sleep with your blankies and stuffed animals so i dont feel so alone.
Mommy feels like all she can do is cry,
but she cant and she doesnt know why.
Aria if you can hear me I just want you to know that,I love you and miss you so much
with my emotions and everything i dont feel so tough .
Daddy and I never thought in a million years this would happen to us.
we were so excited to bring you home.
And to watch you grow
I couldnt wait till you could walk and talk
When dr.Novack told me that if we let you live you wouldnt be able to do those things i wanted so much for you
i was crushed
my mind went all crazy and i knew my time was rushed
I wanted so bad to make you better but i couldnt
Aria your the reason i get up every morning
to make you proud of who i am
Daddy and i hope that your doing great in Heaven
I know you will watch over us
I love you Aria Claire Elizabeth Lund My little princess who was here for so little time and changed my life for ever

poem bout Aria

Poem About my Daughter
not even one word she spoke .
Her path that God already wrote.
Why she had to leave I guess we will never know.
But this i know that we love and miss her so very much.
We wish we could have her back her little hands to touch.
Her beautiful face. To cuddle and hold her in our safe embrace.
I know that she is in a better place.
I could sit here for hours.
have my tears coming out like showers.
I know nothing will ever bring her back.
 and it breaks my heart I feel like I'm having a Heart Attack.
I don't know what life will be like when i have another baby.
 I feel like something will happen this time too just maybe.
I fear i wont love them the way i love her.
I just want to feel like a mother.
I know that I am one.

My Very First Letters To Aria Before She Was Born

my first letter to ARIA

Saturday, Febuary 19, 2011 at 11:12pm
Dear child inside me,
Its crazy how long you've been in me and I didn't know. I heard your heart beat for the first time on febuary 18 2011 and found out you were really in there I cried . I want you to have everything I didn't have . A mommy and a daddy who will always be there for you no matter what. Your dads so excited for you to be born into this world . You will be loved by many people . I just want you to know that your mommy and daddy don't have the easy road and things are hard in life . I love you so much soon I hope I get to find out if your a boy or a girl . I will write to you later.
Your mommy Michaela Rae


Thursday, March 31, 2011 at 5:24pm
Your growing so very fast. Sometimes when you kick it tickles so l laugh .
You are already loved by oh so many.
Its so unreal to think that i didnt find out that you were in belly till i was 23 weeks.
There were so many questions i had and concerns too.
But the doctors reassured me that you were ok and growing right on track.
I cant wait till your here and i can hold you in my arms.
Daddy cant wait either, He loves when he feels you kick it makes him so happy.
You already have a mind of your own.
You kick when you want.
Your always with me where ever i go. I am never alone.